Are We There Yet??

Another friend has graduated and left Columbus. Another friend plans on moving to NYC in November.

A majority of my friends that I speak to on a daily basis are making plans to leave....*wall slide*

I should invest in a webcam.  #skype Yall know America's #1 Grocery Store doesn't pay me enough. Lol

Such is life.....

As much as I wanna celebrate their successes....I have to keep my eye on the prize.

Sometimes I get discouraged because there is so much to do in regards to the application process. 

Recommendations and Personal Statements and Volunteer Hours

You ever want to achieve something so bad you can taste it?

Yes.That's where I am. 

I don't want to rush this last year. 

Super Senior.

But I would love to have that acceptance letter in my hand.

Life is happening.

I'm just gonna get on board

and

ride this thang on out.

Bachelor of Arts in Spanish (Latin American Literatures and Cultures)

Bachelor of Science in Pharmaceutical Sciences

Class of 2012

::Speak Life::

Broken

I fractured my foot yesterday. I'm on crutches. I am soo over the little things. Getting dressed, bathing, and simply waking up are chores. My body is tired. Walking on crutches is a cardio workout that I never want to experience again. Not being able to walk has opened my eyes to a whole new world. Thank God and legislation for handicapped bathrooms, railings, and ramps. I'm realizing that my apartment really isn't ideal for one with a temporary handicap. There are 5 stairs that separate me from the entrance to my apartment complex and my apartment door. I loathe them. I haven't quite mastered them. I can't blame anyone but myself. I am fiercely independent and this fractured foot won't let me great. I'm not sure if these tears are due to PMS or the fact that my daily life has become one huge chore. I can't call it and I can't really worry about it. I have two finals, Monday and Tuesday respectively. I wish I could drive. At least, I would be able to go to work  Money is the motive
I'm sick of talking about how I hurt my foot. I'm sick of people thinking my clumsy tale is funny. When you actually hear your bone break.....it's not really a laughing matter. I'm sick of people asking if I need anything (let's be honest....who's really gonna follow through?...I'll wait. People say things because those are the nice things you are supposed to say. I'm convinced most people don't mean it when they are actually called to action *shrugs*)
My follow up appointment on Thursday is the light at the end of this clumsy tunnel.
The only thing is there are 120 hours between now and then. 

Who she be??!

I have been a ball of incoherent emotions lately.
Who have I become?!
In the words of Carrie Bradshaw, "If I met me now, I wouldn't even know me"
I allowed my emotions to be turned inside out
by someone who doesn't even know.
*blankstare and side eye to me*
....like I said,
Who have I become?
You like and you learn, right?!
Hope is a double edged sword
that I'm tired of holding onto
I'm spent
Hope has worn me out
but then I remind myself,
Never expect anything from someone who promised you nothing. ((wise words))
So I have gathered myself and my things
licking my wounds
when we meet again
I'll be singing a different tune
:-)

Random Rumblings #2

I think about you all the time.

I'm beginning to feel a little silly doing so.

Why?

Not really sure if you're thinking about me.

*looks around the room*

Yes I said it

I'm not sure

and

I so want to be

Well I think I want to be....

Confusion offers no answers

Maybe someday soon

you will

or maybe you won't

I can't call it

But either way

I'll be okay

I'll just reminisce

about your side smile

that I always thought was

only for me ;-)

The Gray Area

"I think a committed relationship would complicate an already complicated life"

"*blankstare* I never said I wanted to be in a relationship with you or anyone else for that matter"

Do I want to be in a relationship. Honestly it depends on the day! Sometimes I need that bf simply to take the garbage out and kill that bug that mysteriously appeared on my wall. Basically I need him to carry out the stereotypical roles of his species. ( I kid,I kid well only about the garbage that bug on the other hand....). There are days that I seriously would like a relationship....but those moments are fleeting. Then there are those days when I love that I can go about my day and not think about his emotions, how I'm going to fit him into my day, or any other relationship type things. So honestly, I'm not sure if I want a relationship today or tomorrow.

And I can't say I subscribe to the let's just see where it's gonna go line either. I'm kinda in the middle of it all. Dare I say it? I currently reside in a gray area of some sorts. I usually don't like gray areas but that's where I found myself today. I'm okay with that.

The truth is the light......

"I want more than what you're offering.

Doesn't make him a bad guy

just not the guy for me"

New Years Eve :)

....no resolutions this year but that doesn't quite mean I don't want to make any changes. It's New Years Eve and it feels like just another day to me *shrugs*

Any who,

2010 was an interesting year to say the least. I learned so much about myself and even more about the people that were in my life at the time. Each of them served their purpose and in the end looking back on it

*there was a lesson to be learned

Mistakes were made. At times, I knowingly did things that probably weren't a good idea. But then again..... "A girl can wait for the right man to come along but in the meantime that still doesn't mean she can't have a wonderful time with all the wrong ones."

2010 was something else I tell you. My friends graduated leaving me behind as I finished my undergraduate career, boys came and went, most of my life was spent in the confines of SEL, new friends were made, there were tears and moments of despair

but I can honestly say that laughter and prayer outweighed it all :)

So 2010 I bid adieu. *raises glass*

2011, I welcome you with an open heart and open spirit

Hopefully Hope (7 out of 10)

I'm scared

that my heart may never know love

See I have created love

flowing from my pen onto pages

is where I write

how love should be

could be

would be

fairy-tales don't live there often

while hope is a constant

constantly getting my hopes up

making me believe

love will live on my doorstep

my poems breathe life

into a love I have yet to meet

love

just a figment of a writer's imagination

a fleeting feeling

caught between my thoughts

hopefully

hope will

let love

live

because

writing of love lost

is becoming too familiar

I'm waiting to write

the poem

when love introduce's

his self to me

hopefully hope will let me recognize him